Friday, September 24
1)7 pre-booked dinners dates
2)missing macho wil
3)daily morning calls from a schweet somebody i cant thank enough
4)5 pre-booked lunch dates
5)sucked at the last game of golf and wakeboarding
6)3 edgy days = 3 victims
7)bonding with mumsie
8)4 pre-booked movie dates
9)planning for short getaways
10)butterflies in my stomache
that's not all, but limiting to 10 would be a wiser choice.
meeting my dear bitcheeboos tomorow and i cant sleep tonight. see ya babes at mon petite.
background + lamb
Saturday, September 18
mama mia free tix.
- dammit. someone just told me he can get me free tix for mama mia but its a weekday afternoon show. im sitting here, cursing, and swearing, and sulking, and, AND, and..i cant do a dang thing about letting this precious slipped pass me. i told him he made me excited for a second and unshamefully saying the free tix was the power of the cause.
freebie whore, cheapskate bitch and greedy lil prick.
this is me.
Tuesday, September 14
Not Switched Off Enough.
- ive been staring into space and snapping myself out of this trance state that my subconciousness lead me to, where all i see is multi couloured circles that wouldnt stop circulating over the smaller ones. could it be related to forcing myself to not think too hard, or its just that i didn't switch off enough, i just cant comprehand.
after a much satiated dinner earlier, i feel fat.. again. but i really do. i had gain some noticable fats around my waistline and arms, don't you believe? can't you see? why don't anyone believe me anymore? just because i'm a smaller size than u dosen't make me fat free forever, so i have a weight to watch too you know. you just think that im never putting on enough weight for you to notice, or you just didn't want to notice at all.
gosh, i don't even know what im blabbering here. forgive me, will u? maybe im too fat and lazy to be making sense. argh. wotever.
background + coldplay
we never change
Sunday, September 12
- today's set wasnt good. i really must put in put more effort to memories lyrics. my memory box is small and i have to be selective of what it can absorb to prevent overflowing. meeting the babes from the airport tomorow for luch and there's birthday dinner at night. my dinner appointments for next week has been fully booked. see how crazy it can be? gosh.
oh, i saw THE TERMINAL, a american comedy classic on friday night. im not good with reviews, so i just wanna say, with the outstanding work of Steven Spielberg n Tom Hanks,its worth my 8.5bucks and u should catch it. there are certain scenes which i was very emo about and was so close to tearing, especially when Navorski found out about his homeland's crisis. there were laughters everywhere when he was desperately hoping to reach the news and to find out wot had happened to his country, banging from tv to tv hand signalling ppl to help him translate the news with a look of frantic and deperation. there was no one who's willing to lend a hand of coz,which is the part i din think its funny to be laugh about. *shrugs* just go watch it. i had a good laugh throughout most part of it though. terminally entertaining.
background + coldplay
Friday, September 10
I still wanna love her.
- ive been trying and i am glad ive been able to answer my mum with a lighter tone now, there was once i actually even smile at her even when the day hasn't been good...
everytime i walked into the house, she will start asking questions and that irks me alot. when i have all crazy things to fight with and trying so hard to be normal, i just wanna come home to a peaceful space and loving family who are understanding(which i think my mum will never even attempt to try on this part). especially when she ask about things that already have answers right in front of her. i am an unfilial and rude daughter and i hated myself for ignoring her. sistakin has always been the angel of the two of us, she told me "i know u have your principles and u dont give in to people who disrespects, but if u dont pamper her now, what if one day she's gone like daddy and you wont even have the chance to anymore?". sigh. wotever. it hurts that this relationship is going downfall and im struggling too hard to prove and make her realise she is NOT ALWAYS RIGHT. she might never realise it anyway and i really want to tell her i love her so much but i cant yet coz i had chose to avoid her rather than always ending up disagreeing or worst, a fight. i have learnt to love myself and now, i want to learn to love the people who loves or even loved me. unconditionally. i want to be really happy. be nice. be patient. ba caring. be loved and ultimately, be loving.
i miss the old days when she make monthly visits when we were staying with dad, bringing us to KFC for a yummy feast and theme park for train rides. i like to watch her puffing her dunhill cigarette and leaving purple lipstick stains on the filter. i remember i how used to adore her so much wanted to grow up to be like her,so strong, smart and beautiful. what happened along the way? i am looking forward to be able to hug her and tell her i love her. i am going to try harder this time.
background + morcheeba
Saturday, September 4
- lets share a teeeny bit of my excitement for next week..we signed up for rock-climbing lesson on one of these sundays! let's hope i can catch up with 2 rides this month too! i miss wakeboarding lah, its crazy man.
my new adventure costs a whooping $70/each for a day! gosh, maybe i should master this and earn some big money as an instructor or some sort. *rubs chin* hmm..eversince the major economic downfall, or whatever crisis this dump world infected since 1997, the government had urge consumers to support local trade and i swear I DID some fair share of my support(s) here. if not, you did. right(?)
WHY WON'T THE P-R-I-C-E-S EVER ever EVER(?) D-R-O-P?!
and of coz..SALES doesn't count, you goooons. *fwaps* thats marketing strategy, not something they offered out of good will wot. they just make us contribute stupidly for all these years for all the bits and pieces,AND amazingly, i realise DA WHOLE WORLD is still facing financial crisis and recouperating. *knock knocks* where the hell did our money go? like they always say, "what goes around, comes around", so where did the circulations stop? now here i am, sitting in from of my laptop, typing my rant and pretending to have deep provocative thoughts so as to make my reason for staying up till this early an excuse good enough to pass.
oh, do think about it though. the money flow i mean. *winks* while i'll crawl back to bed, hoping to catch enough sleep, so i don't cock up my 1st performance back at my ex resident club with my ex band gals tonight. *bloss kisses* nightey.
background + tori amos